Friday, March 25, 2005
araw ng pangilin? hindi rin...
funny how reality hits you right in the face when you least expect it. right now, i'm feeling like the pitiful fly crushed in the windshield of a speeding vehicle. suddenly, everything's so huge, and i have lost control over things.
here's the deal: an hs friend has called a meeting, and told us it was very urgent. speculations rose, and mine is that either she's going to migrate or she's pregnant. ding ding ding! the latter's correct. man, i'm a psychic. seriously though, what happened to her made me realized how fast we're becoming adults. you see, she's like the baby of the group. she just turned 18 last year. paano pa kaya kaming mas matatanda?
after i was able to confirm my speculation, i thought, hey what's the big deal? it's just a pregnancy. nothing abnormal about it. but something's amiss... not that i'm saying what she did was wrong... heck, conceiving a child is never wrong, unless you forsake the responsibility which comes with it. it's just that, i feel like we're being rushed... it's not supposed to happen this soon... not when she's got her whole life in front of her... not when all of us were just starting to discover our freedom and really feel how it is to live your life however you want it to.
i am disappointed... she had so much in her... she's already starting a new chapter, yet skipped so many pages of a life that will never be. haaaayyy... di na nya ma-eenjoy ang buhay ng single... awww... it's so hard to feel happy for her when you know she's being deprived of things that she might otherwise experience if not for this.
kasi!!!!!! bakit hindi kayo nag-ingat!!!!! why oh why oh why??????
oh well... enough with the negative thoughts...
the wedding's on the 9th of april... of course i'll be there. i'm trying to be supportive here.
THE FIRSTSmarch 24
-first drinking session. it wasn't as bad as i thought it will be. no case of vomitting in the bath room, just felt dizzy, and it never lasted too. i was as sober last night as i am while i'm writing this. and that was after 2 glasses of red wine, 2 shots of gin and around 5 glasses of beer. ay, ipinagyabang e kakaunti naman pala!
- first real encounter with smoke. i've tried it several times before, but i was such a sissy, i just blew on the stick, like i did when i'm blowing bubbles on a straw while palying with my drink. but that night, i really took it in. coughed it up. then resolved to never do it again. man, that was awful. now i'm totally puzzled why people do it. there's nothing fun or relaxing about it.
- first time i slept in a friend's house. natuto na ko sa kapatid kong sutil. kasi dati, nakiparty sya bahay ng classmate nya, paalam nya kay nanay kay nanay hanggang 10 lang sya. pagdating ng gabi, nagtext sya, sabi wala raw sasakyan kaya dun na sya matutulog. nag-alboroto ang aking ina, ngunit wala syang magawa kasi malayo ang aking kapatid. ginaya ko nga. pagdating ko dun, nagtext ako sa nanay ko na baka di ako makauwi kasi village yun, tapos walang sakayan sa loob... weheheh... it worked! di sya makapalag. ngunit dahil hindi ko inaasahang magagawa ko ito, hindi rin ako nakapaghanda. hindi ako nakapagdala ng gamit. ni toothbrush wala, buti nakabili kami, 2 for 17 pesos... sheettt...
- first time to get a copy of dapitan, which is like ust liberal arts' version of dlsu's malate, only it was far better, more playful, and more imaginative. taob ang malate.
march 25
- first hang over. my head is throbbing and i cannot function well.
=> there's more to the story than what my meager writing skills could capture here... man, i hate myself for not being eloquent.
Morbid Indulgencestarted this journey at3/25/2005
